A Letter With No Name
by Sylphiel Peaceblade
Summary: He knew she was going to get hurt...


Notes: I had to write this. I *HAD* to! ^.^ Its 3:00 in the morning to top it off =P Well, as   
implied in the summary, this is a short little letter/narrative from Cyzaine's point of view. I   
can hear Sir Zak screaming right now and thinking of plans to sue me for abuse of character or  
something... heh heh... but seriously, I tried my best to capture his character from what we've  
RP-ed. So its not completely OOC. not ...completely. ;)   
  
The situation is after Sylphiel decides to give him her "gift". The one she's been holding out...  
(I'm not kidding, she seriously has this in the bank as of writing this ^^). She has not yet  
given it to him, so this is what I could imagine happening... you will know what the gift is as  
you read further on. We have not RP-ed this. Therefore it is not something that is included in  
the actual storyline... just my interpretation of what might happen when we do RP it.  
  
Enjoy!   
*dodges many Anti-EQ bombs*  
(...and Darius, don't kill me!! Like I said this is ALL for fiction's sake! c.C)  
  
~Freija  
  
  
  
~ + ~ + ~ + ~  
  
  
Quellious forgive me, I knew that you were going to get hurt.   
  
  
2 and a half years ago, I knew this from the first moment I saw you. You had the eyes of   
a soul that had seen much pain, and those of your kind are terribly vulnerable. I watched as they would  
light up upon seeing my prescence. I could feel you trembling as I helped you through the   
Blackburrow that first day. And I viewed it all as each of my attempts at kindness backfired over  
and over again.   
  
I probably should have stopped this before it happened. For some reason, there was part   
of me that hoped it wouldn't. So I stayed in contact with you.  
  
Not that it was my fault... what more did I show you besides that of a friend? That of a   
travelling companion? I gave you gifts... small ones, nothing more. Occasionally I would grace  
you with a few kind words, but I never implied anything. ANYTHING.  
  
I figured that you were the type who would jump to conclusions.  
  
And now I am sitting here, staring at the shores, with this rose quartz ring in my hands.  
  
  
I was going to give it back to you. Knowing the merchants of Freeport, you had probably   
spent a decent sum of platinum on it. After I declined your offer, you said that you wanted me to keep it  
anyway.  
  
To be honest, I'm still not too sure why I did...  
  
Surely I could have thrown it back in your face, shattered all of your dreams and   
delusions of grandeur. Part of me wanted to do that. A large part. The part of me that was angry   
at you, Kane, life, the world, the Gods, myself...  
  
But the other part couldn't bring myself to do it. The part that knew this would happen   
from the beginning, and did nothing to stop it. Even your overly homosexual joke-of-a-Paladin   
friend, Chielle, had warned me of what I already knew. The obvious. That you were in love with me  
for some reason unbenounced to me.  
  
Yet what did I do to stop it?  
  
Exactly what I had done to encourage it.  
  
Absolutely nothing.  
  
  
My thoughts turned down a different corner at that moment. Suppose for a moment that I   
had accepted. What would that bring? I would be travelling Norrath constantly and probably never   
see you at all. Obviously Sylphiel, and you know it, that would only hurt you even more.   
  
But would there have been any positive affects?  
  
Personally I see love as very overrated, but perhaps it would be nice to occasionally   
have a partner at my side to watch these Norrathian sunsets. Maybe my journeys wouldn't seem   
quite as long. I could have someone that I could trust with my thoughts, my random musings.   
Someone to spend all this extra money on.  
  
And of course there's that other positive; I wouldn't have had to break your heart.  
  
This way though, as hard as it may be for you to understand, I know is for the best.  
  
  
What else can I say other than that I saw this all coming, and did nothing to stop it?   
That is truly the only thing I do regret about all of this. It was not my fault, nor was it   
yours, that you have become overly attached to an eternal wanderer. I did not give you any signs   
whatsoever, so I suppose you were just seeing things that weren't there.   
  
But I couldn't just tell you right then and there that it wouldn't happen. I wasn't   
strong enough to do that. That was my mistake.  
  
  
The ring is in the pocket of my cloak now. I suspect it will be there at my side while I   
deal the final blow upon my arch rival and end this crusade. It will be there when I can finally   
rest easily, having tasted the tang of revenge. I will watch as Kane breaths his last breath on   
the recieving end of my sword, and I will be grateful...  
  
Oh yes, and I almost forgot to thank you.  
  
Thank you, Sylphiel. A part of me is glad that we have met each other in this vast world. You   
have believed in me for this time being and given me another reason to keep moving forward in   
this often tediously repetitious life. Like the band of this ring, that thought will continue   
endlessly. Maybe not what you had intended, but this is what I will give back to you. Not my   
love, not my affections, but my faith in you as you have given to me. Because I believe that   
this is the one thing you will need most in all of your journeys.  
  
And that is my promise to you that I swear I will not break. Not now, not ever.  
  
  
Regards,  
Cyzaine Peaceblade 


End file.
